Congratulations on getting married! An Oregon mediated prenuptial agreement, or as we casually call them, prenups, helps you first marriage be your forever marriage.
An Oregon mediated premarital agreement process opens-up a conversation about each party’s expectations, responsibilities, and goals for their marriage. Going through the process of talking about each party’s expectations is planning for a strong marriage. Think of a mediated prenup as a smart tool to navigate life’s twists and turns together.
As I was writing this blog, my 17-year-old randomly imparted some wisdom upon me after he asked what I was doing. He said, “Smart people get a prenup. It may not 100% prevent a divorce, but it lights the path for a solid marriage.” Damn, that kid is throwing truth bombs!
I love, love, love marriage! It’s such a beautiful relationship. Although I am a divorce attorney, I hate, hate, hate divorce. I never want anyone planning their divorce before they get married. Honestly, if that’s why you want a prenup, don’t hire me.
So, when a divorce attorney suggests a mediated prenuptial agreement helps create strong marriages, it’s smart to at least listen.
Successful marriages don’t randomly happen. They happen by design and by having difficult conversations with each other. A prenup is simply a marriage by design.
Jobs come and go, health can be unpredictable, and student loans are a thing. A prenup helps you plan for the unexpected, making your marriage resilient.
It’s not about planning to split up; it’s about being prepared for whatever life throws at you.
After you’ve done the hard work of having the difficult conversations about how your marriage should work and, therefore, created your prenup, your mediated prenup will never again come into play unless you are getting a divorce. So, in that vein…
Whether you want it or not, the divorce laws in Oregon act like a default prenup. Meaning that if you don’t have a prenup and you are getting divorced, then the divorce laws of Oregon will impose upon you terms to disentangle your marriage.
No one who is getting married plans to get a divorce in the future… and yet… more people in America get divorced than stay married. Here’s the truth: divorce happens when you least expect it. Most couples who end-up getting a divorce in my office say, “I never saw this coming.”
I cannot think of a single party in my 24+ year career, who was the victim of their spouse’s infidelity and said, “Yep, saw that coming.” In truth, no one thinks their spouse is capable of infidelity until it happens to them.
So, as you read this thinking, “they’d never do that to me,” remember everyone before you said that, too.
You cannot control the other party. You cannot predict the other party.
Frankly, it’s always the one you least suspect who commits infidelity. More often than not, I hear, “I never, ever suspected they had it in them.”
What if your spouse asks for a divorce without any logical reason? It is unfortunate, but true, and it happens all the time.